What the hell is wrong with me?
I'm not who I want to be
I tried spot cream and I tried it all
I'm crawling up the wall

What's my name
Name, name?

I tried to join a ping-pong club
Sign on the door said all full up
I got nicked for fighting in the road
The judge didn't even know

What's my name
Name, name?

Dad got pissed so I got clocked
Couldn't hear the Tannoy so he lost the lot
Offered me a bribe through the letter box
Drives you fucking mad

What's my name
Name, name?

Now I'm round the back of your house at night
Peeping in the window, are you sleeping tight?
I laugh at your locks with my celloid strip
And you won't know who came

What's my name
Name, name?

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